I hate men... maybe I should become a lesbian. Or not.

This weekend was rough. I guess I should start at the beginning, Friday. Friday started out great, I got my hair cut and went to the Vagina Monologues with a friend. Then we hit the bars. A friend of mine had been trying to set me up and the guy, we’ll call him G, was going to be there. We had met before and he got me number. Well, he never called. Typical guy stuff so I wasn’t too worried. Well got there and I could tell G wasn’t interested so I was planning to leave it like that and not pursue. Then something happened (more on that later) and I presided to get trashed. I get sort of confrontational when I get drunk so, ummm, yeah the situation turned ugly, I flipped G off and he left shortly there after.

Ok back to the other situation. There was this other guy who I thought was interested that I met through work. We had been flirting for the past few weeks and the situation became “interesting” last Wednesday. (Ask me about it and I will tell you the whole story, it is well worth it) I had told the girls I was out with about the situation and they were amused. We were standing at the bar waiting for our drinks when I turn around and guess who’s there? You guessed it, work guy! Well the girls made me go talk to him. The basic small talk ensued:
Me: “How are you? How’s your weekend?”
His answer: “I’m good, my GIRLFRIEND came up to visit.”
Me: “Your Girlfriend?”
I don’t remember the rest of the conversation. I went back to my friends and told them what happened. They threatened to kick his ass and tell his girlfriend. Thinking back maybe I should have let them. After this is when I sent myself into a drunken downward spiral. And the fore mentioned flipping off happened shortly there after. After all of this, I decided that I hated men and vowed that I had had enough for a while. That was Friday.

Then Saturday. Valentines Day. Woke up hung over (serves me right I know) and not wanting to go to work. But, I dragged my ass out of bed and went. Mid-afternoon purple tulips showed up. For me. From Brian. He knows that tulips are my favorite flower. Well that about knocked me over. My co-workers, also surprised, and I analyzed the situation. Everyone had a different theory. I went home more confused then ever.

Yes, the flowers cheered me up but they also depressed the shit out of me. Do I miss Brian? Yes. Do I still love him? Definitely. The flowers again made me to realize why. When I talked to him about the flowers he said that he knew that I was having a rough time with school and work and that he wanted to cheer me up. I don’t know what it all means. Maybe nothing. Maybe he just really wanted to be nice and cheer me up. But maybe it did mean something. Maybe he misses me and still loves me. Who the hell knows. I sure don’t.

Oh yeah, did I mention that Sunday was Brian’s birthday? Yeah, ‘nough said. I need a drink.